Penis and Vagina-- Pussy Pump

V: We tried out the penis pump last night.

P: How did it go?

V: It was bigger.. I mean better.. well, bigger and better.

P: I couldn't be happier for you.

V: Didn't you mention another pump?

P: You mean the pussy pump?

V: Right. Is there really such a thing?

P: There most certainly is.

V: Now, what exactly does it do?

P: It'll make your labia swell up.

V: It isn't going to make me look fat, is it?

P: Oh boy..

Penis and Vagina-- Penis Pump

P: Does size really matter?

V: Sure does. The larger the tool, the better it fits the job.

P: And does Ron have a large "tool"?

V: Let's just say he's very skilled handling it.

P: So it's not very big.

V: I didn't say that.

P: Exactly. Which means you wish he was bigger.

V: Maybe.

P: Have you ever tried a penis pump?

V: No. Does it actually work?

P: It won't make Ron's prick grow twice as big permanently.

V: What use is it then?

P: It might make him engorged for a while.

V: That doesn't sound all bad.

P: What about trying a pussy pump while you're at it.

V: You've got to be kidding. Is there really such a thing?

P: Maybe next time.

Craigs List

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The Cat and the Rooster

Time for a little humor in the form of a joke I remember hearing a log time ago..

This rooster was hanging out by a pool when he saw a stupid, arrogant cat headed his way. Looking for some fun, the rooster started muttering how no cat had ever out jumped him just loud enough so the passing cat could hear him. The cat stopped, took one look at the rooster's scrawny legs, and challenged him to a jumping contest on the spot. The rooster agreed and both animals dashed to the pool's edge. The cat sprang gracefully through the air and splashed nearly half way across the pool. In the meantime the rooster's puny legs propelled him no more than a foot into the pool. Before hitting the water the rooster hastily flapped and flew over to the other side of the pool without getting a drop of water on him. The cat yelled at the rooster for cheating, but the rooster couldn't stop laughing at his soaked competitor.

The moral of the story: Where there's a wet pussy you'll find a happy cock.

Returning to Man's Origins

Isn't it ironic that a man's life begins when he exits the birth canal and then he spends his entire adult life trying to reenter it?

Everybody wants to find the most beautiful, perfect vagina, right? Right. I know I'm right. That's why porn is a multi billion dollar industry. Mankind is fascinated with the vagina. We want to see the nice juicy, fleshy, meaty, pink pussy in all its naked glory. So close that you could almost taste it or smell it. Our vision starts with the pubic hair. Here we may encounter the natural unshaven bush of pubic hair although this is becoming a rarer site these days. Usually we find the pubic hair trimmed back around the bikini line or entirely trimmed. Further grooming brings us to hair shaped into triangles, circles, hearts, and landing strips. Let us not forget the now popular completely shaved pussy begging the voyeur onward.

The journey has indeed just begun as our eyes are drawn down the angles of the Vee to the vagina. The outer vagina entrance is covered by the lovely labia which are much like curtains. The labia may be almost unnoticeable or can be large flaps of fleshy skin. Nestled at the top of the labia and hidden under a hood of skin lies the clit. The elusive clitoris with its shiny ball-like shape must be the most erotic vision one could ever pursue. Pulling back those luscious labia allows one to next feast on all the other seldom seen vaginal pleasures. Not far below the lovely clitty we have a small, succulent opening which is the urethra or better known as the peehole. Tasty and succulent as the pee hole may be, our eyes only need wander a touch further south to find the glorious vaginal opening. The pink muscled walls of the vagina glisten with sexual wetness inviting you inside. Was this the vagina you were searching for or does your search continue?

Good luck in your quest to find the perfect vagina.